Who's Crazy? You Or Me?

You have to abide by a certain unspoken code of conduct when living in a society. The less you are willing to do it, the more your ass gets kicked. I, for one, am a very 'code-of-conduct-abiding' kind of citizen. Not particularly in favour of my posterior being roughed around, you see. But sometimes even the best of us can fail. Like when one is dead-drunk. Convinced that every girl on the block is waiting for us to show them a good time, we can be suitably inspired to some amazingly embarrassing 'Kodak Moments.' Sometimes, situations such as these can be extremely unsympathetic to one's hind-side. Though there is one in a million chances that memory will aide us the next morning. Ignorance can be such bliss!

But on a normal day, when good folks, people you have known for a while, start giving you strange looks, you know something is amiss. Which is what makes this particular issue I am going to talk about perplexing.

I have started noticing it recently. It happens with almost everyone I talk to. I'm doing nothing unusual, just talking to them, and there, right in the middle of a sentence, they start giving me that look. A look that you would usually reserve for two-legged elephants or three-eyed monsters.

I try to hide my anxiety, act normal and continue the conversation. I see my listeners slowly taking defensive postures. Then I sense simmering hostility. Their face flushes, muscles become tense and breathing becomes heavy. If I'm dumb enough not to notice these screaming loud 'DO NOT ENTER' signs (which most of the time I am), and keep on talking, I find myself almost an inch away from being lynched publicly!

These strange incidents of unprovoked anger are becoming more and more common now. So much so that I hardly step out anymore. I have stopped answering my phone. My emails. I open my door only to pick up the milk and newspaper left on my steps. I sure do not want to upset anyone. Nor do I want to be lynched, publicly or otherwise.

For the last couple of days, I have tried to comprehend this unexplainable situation that I find myself in. I look back and I see nothing suspicious on my part, nothing out-of-the-ordinary to warrant provocation of such extreme order. Except, yes, one thing. A very tiny thing, in fact.

I see that the instant mutation in my audience has almost always happened when I have mentioned a certain word. Yes! That must be it. It seems ridiculous but that is the only logical explanation I can find. I see now that somehow, for some reason beyond my understanding, people have taken an excessive aversion' to the word, 'change.' They not only don't like it, they hate it with gusto. If voodoo worked, they would be busy right now, sticking needles in their voodoo dolls round-the-clock , just to kill anyone who dares mention 'change.'

I wonder why. 'Change' isn't a bad word or is it? It isn't impolite, improper or inappropriate. It's a harmless word. But the fact that I am holed-up inside my house for four weeks without any human contact suggests it is not so. Not anymore.

'Change' has become a symbol of pure, unadulterated hatred. 'Change' has become a sign of idealism, dreams and out-right stupidity to be hung around the necks of a 'few.' The few who's voices are heard but never acknowledged, who's actions are seen but never responded to, who's love for this world is felt but never shared. 'Change' has become an Utopian ideal good for intellectual masturbation. 'Change' has come to mean fear. 'Change' has come to mean iconoclasm. A threat to status-quo. 'Change' has come to be the great divider among brothers. Among those who want to live and those who wouldn't care.

I do not speak of change with any grand plans for you. I speak for myself. I mention change only because I am sad with what I see around me. I am sad with how my world is going down the drain. I am sad that most of us don't seem to care. I am sad that global warming, deforestation, AIDS, poverty, war, illiteracy, terrorism and a lot of other such miserable things are true and I'm not able to do much to prevent them. I am sad that women in my society can be gang raped on streets in broad day light and no body even talks about it. I am sad that children are sold for prostitution in my world. I am sad that someone can be burned to death for not giving 'dowry.' I am sad that I have to bribe people to get myself decent education, a job, a house, even medical treatment.

I am very sad with what's happening around me. That is true. And I know the only way I can be happy is if I change the things that make me sad. If I have to be happy I have to change what exists. Sorry? You didn't hear me. Sure, I can repeat that. I said I have to change things around me to be happy. And I want to be happy. Don't you? Or would you rather enjoy a sad life?

Some of us believe we are born on this earth to pay for our sins. It's only upon death that Heaven will be granted to Man. Some of us take that as a good reason to wallow in the misery surrounding us. To live in a frustrated, fierce desire of death. Well, I am not waiting to die to be happy. Nor have I any sins to pay for. This is my Earth and this is my Heaven. I will do whatever I can to change it if that's the only way for me to be happy. If you too seek happiness, start by speaking the word 'change.' You can see who your friends and who your enemies are immediately!