Help! There's A Stranger In My Bed!

I'm not complaining. I'm just surprised. I mean, I'm a married man and all, you see. We are supposed to maintain a certain decorum in the society. Live by a certain code of conduct. Though I do appreciate the beautiful lassies around, I'm not the kind to stray. No sir, that just ain't me. I believe in the old-school of marriage. One man committed to one woman sort of thing. It's complicated enough, I say. I do wonder why good, sane men get more than one into the equation and complicate it beyond salvation. It's beyond me.

I'm not saying women are complicated. They may be. I'm saying we men are very simple people. We'll never understand why there should be 32 different shades of red, or why it's uncouth to eat on the couch. We are wired differently. To us, A is A, B is B and life is pretty neat. We are very happy to keep it that way too. So, imagine my surprise to find a stranger in my bed this morning. I was not looking for an adventure at this particular moment in my life. Especially not the kind that involves mysteries that I cannot explain to you, me or the society.

As far as I remember, when I went to bed last night all was well with my life. I had just quit a very well paying job to chase my dream of doing good for the society (Read more about it here in my previous post - 'Today I Quit Work To Change The World!'). My good friends and colleagues had wished me all the best, while looking at me strangely. Of course, I understand their anxiety. Age-old wisdom says that acts such as mine are neither a fashion nor very wise. Have you noticed that people are comfortable when they know why you are doing what you are doing. The moment they can't predict your motive they seem to be ill-at-ease around you. They start eyeing you suspiciously. It's always like you have an ace up your sleeve and they are not happy about it. Or you are going to spring a surprise on them which they are not going to like. Nothing could be further from the truth but that lingering hostility and defensiveness remain.

When I broke the news to my father, he looked at me as if I was joking but somehow the humour in it escaped him. At 33, like all responsible men, he was trying to secure the future for his wife and two kids. And here I was, giving up everything that promised me a 'safe, secure' future to help the community. Help the community? The Community? What was that? But the real good thing about my father is that he is a very sane man. He does not argue with insanity! My mother on the other side is a tough nut to crack. She can strike you dumb with such illogical 'logic' that only a mother can get away with. Yesterday, even she was dumbstruck.

My wife is the only person who seems happy for me. In fact, she is delighted. She knows I could be just as easily heading off to Himalayas in search of my 'self'. Now that would be tough to explain. Especially when all your friends husbands happen to be doing earthly jobs of doctors, bankers, software professionals, diamond merchants and like. She is only worried if I would start using telekinesis to alleviate poverty or use telepathy to educate the society. Since the day we married she has come to the conclusion that 'Alice in Wonderland' must be her story. But she loves me and I love her and that pretty much takes care of everything else, so I'm not worried.

Now, if things are going as good for you as they are for me, you wouldn't want to upset it with doing something stupid. No matter how tempting they may look at the moment. That is what differentiates the men from the boys, right? The ability to think with their minds firmly in their pants rather than wandering where it should not.

So here I am trying to recollect where was I last night. Six straight shots of scotch whiskey can make everything look murky, I know. But since I don't drink, what could have possibly induced that effect in me? No, I don't do drugs either. People think I'm fairly wonky without much 'external assistance' anyway. I believe I went to bed yesterday just the way I went to bed the day before. Or the day before that. It was just a usual 'going-to-bed.'

Except the fact that I woke up to a whole new reality. It was like I had died and born as someone I hardly recognised. There was no 5a.m alarm screaming at me. There was no hurry to rush through the morning breakfast and run for the daily grind. I wasn't reading the Economic Times or scanning financial reports to see if my clients were doing well around the country. My mobile phone hadn't rung for a straight 14 hours since I went to bed last night. I wasn't fanatically trying to remember the facts and figures for another one of my client meetings. I wasn't even trying to remember anything. I was just there. Free and terribly conscious of a strange sinking feeling within.

Things that, just a night before, had defined me as a person, things that I could point to to justify my existence as a social being were no longer there. I was a free radical, floating alone in a universe that seemed to run perfectly well without me. If you have ever been in that place, you would know what I mean. Suddenly, everything looked disproportionately large and terrifying.

I sat in my bed and watched the sun rays glide gently in through my window and make a light pool on the floor. It reflected on my glistening wardrobe. I never had noticed that before. There were two crow nests on the tree outside. I think a mama crow was trying to feed one of her unruly chicks, cause she was making a lot of 'crow' noise.

My wife came in from the bathroom, all fresh and ready for the day. She had shoulder length hair. I always thought she had a 'bob cut' or something. I don't remember seeing that tattoo on her shoulder either. God! Where have I been? Atleast I recognise that characteristic amused smile of her's still. The one thing that made me do what no other woman in the world could make me do – get married!

I guess she saw me stare at her. Looking at me quizzically, she said, "So Tiger, looks like a brilliant day to start changing the world! What say?"

Sitting there in my bed, half asleep, hearing her voice I felt something strange. Like a blinding flash, deep within, I felt the limitless love this woman had given me. I felt the courage she had displayed in times of exceptional need. Somehow, at that very moment, an unspoken truth formed words within my mind. I found myself thinking, "I'd give up my life than do something to make this woman cry." I don't think I have ever said that to her. Or even admitted it to myself. I guess I never thought about it. I was always busy. I had 'important' things to think about. Things that were worth lakhs of rupees to my company, crores to my clients, and much more to the faceless millions I served day in and day out.

But now, there was nothing on my mind. It was as clean as a new slate. There was just me and my wife. And a life ahead that I hope to spend making this community I exist in a little better than how I found it. For me. For you. And for all those that I will never know.

Gee! I don't recognise this man talking to me? Do You? LOL